The Mirthful Man Behind the Mystery Men
By Dan Brown It was August 6, 1999, when Mystery Men was released in movie theatres. As a superhero parody, I believe it stands the test of time all these years – and superhero movies – later. The idea of celebrating a motion picture’s 27th anniversary may seem absurd because journalists are supposed to write stories on the big anniversaries of a film’s debut, like the 10th, the 25th, the 50th – not a nonsensical one like No. 27. But if there’s one person who would appreciate the randomness of a 27th anniversary column, it’s the guy who created the Mystery Men, Bob Burden. I’ll be absolutely candid up front: I can’t, in a column like this, possibly do justice to Burden’s eccentric sense of humour – either in his comics, or in real life. His wit is so sardonic it approaches the poetic. I’ve interviewed him only once, when I was an arts writer at the National Post and did an explainer on the Mystery Men – the B-list comic characters who inspired the movie. “My life goes between total undisciplined mayhem and the discipline of a surgeon having his brow wiped as he’s in the 11th hour of a very touchy operation,” he told me over the phone from Atlanta. Maybe you recall Mystery Men. If not, let me refresh your memory: It stars a group of working-class schmoes who aren’t ready for the superhero big time. They don’t belong in the MCU or the DCU or any other respectable universe. They include the Bowler (Janeane Garofalo), who tosses a mystical bowling bowl with her father’s skull embedded in it. The Shoveler (William H. Macy) is armed with King Arthur’s shovel. The Spleen (Paul Reubens) has only one power: Being able to generate really toxic farts. And Mr. Furious (Ben Stiler) is able to get . . . really angry. They were a direct contrast to glamorous characters who had made the transition to the big screen by the late 1990s, like Batman and Superman. My favourite of the lot was their mentor, the Sphinx, who spoke in aphorisms like: * “He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions.” * “When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack.” * “When you care what is outside, what is inside cares for you.” * “You must be like wolf pack, not six pack.” Burden co-wrote the Mystery Men script, infusing the dialogue with his skewed humour. As funny as the picture still is, though, it doesn’t compare to the comics. There are only four issues of the title (which is officially Mysterymen, not Mystery Men, like the movie title). If you really want to understand his characters, and Burden’s ironic view of the world, it’s worth your while to hunt them down. In fact, the very best way to experience Burden’s storytelling is to find the title where the the less-than-super team originally debuted, Flaming Carrot Comics. Burden created Flaming Carrot long before the Mystery Men. That’s where they first appeared, then were spun off from the Carrot’s adventures and seized upon by Hollywood. As the name suggests, Flaming Carrot is a crackpot superhero with a huge carrot mask that has a flame on top. He became simple-minded after his brain was damaged from reading 5,000 comics in one sitting, which means his solution to most situations is to shoot everyone in sight. In their first adventure together, Flaming Carrot teams up with the Mystery Men to fight an army of Nazi boots cloned from the feet of Hitler. I asked Burden where he got the idea for a hero disguised by a giant carrot mask: “It was probably the dumbest idea anybody’s ever come up with for a comic character, so I said, ‘Let’s run with it.’” I was also curious back then about how much of his own personality comes through in Flaming Carrot. “That’s something that a lot of people ask, and I would ask, ‘How much of Flaming Carrot is potentially in all of us?’ I think we all need to go wandering with no direction some day on a sunny afternoon like a baby with his diaper falling off.” That, my friends is Bob Burden in a nutshell. If you dig square superheroes like the Avengers or the Justice League, Mystery Men won’t be your cup of tea. But if you’re in the mood for taking a walk off the beaten path, check them out! Let me know in the comments if you’ve seen Mystery Men. Do you agree it stands up as a spoof of the superhero genre? Is there one you think is better? Dan Brown has covered pop culture for more than 33 years as a journalist and also moderates L.A. Mood’s monthly Graphic-Novel Group book club.
Will New Crossovers Keep It Fresh?
By Dan Brown Incoming! A new batch of DC/Marvel collaborations begins landing in comic stores this month. As old comic fans like me well know, crossovers are an age-old marketing tradition. The question is: Can the combined talent of comicdom’s two industry leaders make them feel fresh and exciting in 2025? The collabs, one published by each company, were announced in February. L.A. Mood’s Matt Finch alerted me they were in the pipeline because he knew I would remember the ones from the 1970s and onward. Those stories take place out of regular continuity. That allows the legal wall between DC and Marvel to be torn down, the result being Superman can team up with Spider-Man, the New Teen Titans with the X-Men, Batman with the Hulk, and so on. Crossovers were once rare, momentous events. When I cast my mind back to the 1970s, I still remember being stunned at the sight of the Man of Steel and Spidey squaring off on the cover of the same comic. Although I was just a dumb kid, I understood this was something special that didn’t happen every month. That’s probably why I grabbed every crossover – typically printed in a larger format – that came my way. Since these special issues sold so well, they quickly evolved into a cottage industry within the larger comics business, and as more independent publishers popped up, those new players tried to grab a piece of the action. Batman has co-starred with Judge Dredd. Archie met the Predator once. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have taken on Flaming Carrot. Flash-forward to this year, and Godzilla seems to be omnipresent in comics, breathing fire and stomping skyscrapers in every publisher’s imaginative universe. Crossovers represent an extension of the idea of continuity: If every Marvel superhero exists in the same metaverse together, why can’t they exist alongside DC’s stable of stars as well, at least temporarily? The first of the new books will see Deadpool face off against the Dark Knight, with backup stories combining Daredevil and Wonder Woman, and Krypto and Jeff the Land Shark, in the same volume. Along those lines, this summer I found an old Wizard magazine from 1994 in a second-hand bookstore. Among the then-current industry news was a brief touting an upcoming Batman/Punisher outing. That’s how ubiquitous they became. It was from those earlier crossovers that I was first introduced to such characters as the Jack Kirby-created baddie Darkseid. (Lord knows I love Walter Simonson’s art, but how did George Perez not get the assignment when the Titans met the X-Men in 1982?) So that particular volume was instrumental in introducing each company’s fans to the other’s lineup of characters. Crossovers became a way of cross-pollinating different fandoms. Those who loved both of this summer’s big-screen superhero outings – Superman and The Fantastic Four: First Steps – may be surprised to learn that Supes was, like the Silver Surfer, once a herald of Marvel planet-eater Galactus. Yep, it happened in 1999’s Superman/Fantastic Four: The Infinite Destruction, one of the best dual efforts from back in the day. Speaking of the movies, if it’s really true that audiences are finally tiring of superhero stories, how long will it be before one of the big brains in Hollywood suggests using the same strategy on the silver screen that has worked in comics? Isn’t that the logical next step – putting unlikely heroes beside each other to sell movie tickets? I’m betting it’s only a matter of time. If the Alien and the Predator can slug it out, why not put DC heroes and Marvel’s finest beside one another in a motion picture? Indeed, how long until a single mega-company – think Disney – assembles all the characters it owns from different media in the same movie adventure? Admit it: You love the idea of Luke Skywalker partnering with Tony Stark to fight the combined villainy of Darth Vader and Doctor Doom! Dan Brown has covered pop culture for more than 33 years as a journalist and also moderates L.A. Mood’s monthly graphic-novel group.
